Planning for the Big Day

by Jason Hamilton, CFP^®

Life-changing events such as retirement involve an ongoing process of emotional adjustment, often not thought of or addressed until after the “Big Day.” In reality, it’s many of the same emotions you’ve already gone through while planning for a marriage or if you’ve experienced a divorce. The latter have years and years of research for you to read through and help you understand what you’re getting yourself into or how to emotionally deal with the situation. For retirees, there is much less research to rely on as you plan for retirement. 

The psychological processes of marriage and retirement do seem to parallel each other. After the honeymoon is over, married couples have to adjust their life and learn how to live together with their spouse. Budgeting household finances may be new to them, they now have to think about the other half of the relationship and not just themselves. For some, that can seem like a simple process, but for many couples, it’s more difficult than they thought. 

Your retirement honeymoon is very similar, while often celebrated with a party with lots of hugs, handshakes, tears and then you’re off. For a little while, this newfound freedom is great, but then the reality of what every day may look like sets in. Now you and your spouse have even more time together and setting new boundaries and guidelines of how marriage looks in retirement may be needed. You may not have prepared yourself for the loneliness, extra free time, or the feeling of uncertainty that could come with retirement. Not all experience this, but many will at some point. 

This is why retirement planning is important, not only are you planning a budget and evaluating your assets to see if and when you can retire, but that you spend just as much time evaluating what retirement will mean for you personally. I suggest you do your own research, and ask others who have already retired what the adjustment was like and how they overcame your same fears. Retirement looks different for everyone – some may find themselves busier than ever with volunteer positions, grandchildren, or part-time jobs. Others may take the opportunity to re-identify who they are and find themselves again within this new stage of life. The bottom line is life planning is important to a successful retirement. Retirement will be great, but you will have to put some work into knowing who you are and what you have to do to have a smooth transition. For those who put thoughtful effort into this, they will have a much better experience early on in retirement.

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